Long-Distance Relationships (of all types)

Once high school is over there is a whole new set of challenges that people face. The increased workload and financial debt that is part of being a university student is what your family tries to prepare you for.  What they don’t prepare you for is how your post-secondary life could effect your relationships. This includes the romantic ones, and the friendship ones. University presents these relationships with a whole new set of obstacles, the biggest one being distance. This could be interpreted in two different ways, the first being an emotional distance. University eats up a large section of your life, between attending classes and getting papers in on time, there isn’t always time to spend with the ones you want to. This could mean a romantic relationship that suffers in the mean time. In this case the important thing to remember is that we’re still young. We have tons of time to date and experience heartbreak, so sometimes letting go of relationships that will end up hurting more in the long run is best. The important relationships to keep are those with the friends who care about you. But what if your best friend isn’t there to help you through the heartbreak? This brings me to my second type of distance: location. Just because they’re your best friend doesn’t mean they have the same goals you do. It’s entirely possible that they might end up going to school in a different city than you do. This is the case with my best friend and I. We have a more unconventional friendship where we tend to end up insulting each other more than actually being friendly, but we’re still there for each other when we need it. While I’m happy to attend Nipissing, my best friend, Sarah, attends Laurentian U. Just to give you an insider look into our friendship here are some embarrassing photos of her and I 🙂

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So getting to the point of this blog here are my top five tips on how to keep your best friend close even when they’re far away.

1. Keeping in contact

– Sarah and I are the types of friends who could go weeks without seeing or even talking to each other, but are right back to normal when we do. But not all friendships are like this. If you know you’re the type of person who has to keep in contact to maintain your friendship, then do it! You can text them (or as my mother would say email them), Skype, talk on the phone, or even go old school and send them a letter in the mail.

2. Being there through tough times for one another

– Part of having a best friend is having someone there when you’re going through a tough time. I could spend hours going for a walk (or more realistically sitting down at the nearest McDonald’s) venting to my best-friend about anything. On a more serious note, ensure that your friend knows you are there for them. It may be a fight with the boyfriend or something more serious, but its crucial for both parties to be able to trust one another to be there for them when they need it.

3. Visiting

– You don’t have to see each other every five minutes to be best friends. But it is important to see each other. While in school, take advantage of the holidays! You may just be able to catch up for five minutes, but make every minute count!

4. Accept that change is inevitable

– You can’t expect things not to change when you add distance as a factor in a friendship. Don’t be scared of change, embrace it! It may even make your friendship stronger.

5. Being honest (To them and to yourself)

-Don’t build up unrealistic exceptions. Some friends are only meant to be in your life for a short amount of time, and others are there for a lifetime. So if you lose contact with your friend, it’s not the end of the world. It only opens the door to your next potential best friend!